Monday, April 04, 2005
MY COLLEAGUE IS A SUPER FREAK
Glutton man is really a freak. He's really got a serious eating disorder. He steals peoples sandwiches from the office fridge. He's never been busted but I know it's him. We all do. I'm ready to do the ultimate now. I'm ready to plant a sandwich "for stealing" with laxative mixed in the mayo (the "Super Colon Blow" kind) or make a cat food sandwich. He is such a fucking moron and I think he deserves this. People put their names on their bags so there should be NO EXCUSE. I know he can get sick, but you know what? I CAN PUT WHAT EVER I WANT TO IN MY SANDWICH. After all it's MY SANDWICH. If he steals it and gets sick and bitches at me about it, I can rightly say, "WHY THE FUCK DID YOU EAT MY SANDWICH?" Any better ideas out there?
Comments:
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You still need to make your sandwich at least appear appealing. If he smells cat food he might not touch it.
Additional salt is something he might not sense until the bite -- or how about some cayenne pepper?
Don't do anything too weird or drastic or else people might point fingers at you for food poisoning or they might say you are a malcontent.
Have you ever tried to confront the guy and just ask him to stop taking your sandwich?
Why don't you buy a gag that's harmless like a can of peanuts that releases a spring in the shape of a snake when the lid is screwed off?
Does he drink your soda?
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Additional salt is something he might not sense until the bite -- or how about some cayenne pepper?
Don't do anything too weird or drastic or else people might point fingers at you for food poisoning or they might say you are a malcontent.
Have you ever tried to confront the guy and just ask him to stop taking your sandwich?
Why don't you buy a gag that's harmless like a can of peanuts that releases a spring in the shape of a snake when the lid is screwed off?
Does he drink your soda?
# posted by 
: April 05, 2005 2:54 AM
: April 05, 2005 2:54 AM << Home
